Freedom

How is it that we can contradict so easily and hardly explain?

Your presence is a need and want but neither is because of the terrors you cause at night when my mind catches up with my heart.

As much as it wants to run away from the realities behind the emotions, it can’t control the waves of uncertainty and darkness taking over its too long denied fragility. What will become of me

when you take it all away?

So easy for you to forbid and ban and deny, but it isn’t that way for me when there are so many roadblocks placed in my life. So I lay low and crawl towards my goals instead of sprinting ahead towards the long craved sunrise.

Your blockade of my light won’t hold back my life, only slow it down, so what’s the point?

Pushing me to my breaking point is cruel and coming back with a hug and an apology won’t give me back my time, rewind my mind that already has lengthy songs of pain on replay,

I think sometimes of relaying these thoughts to you, running them through your head with a wire, reinforce the idea with a screw, but what use will it be when the wires are cut by you, all the effort thrown away, screwed.

I wish I could get through, shine the light that is truth, free myself of the burden, the contradictory thought that is you–

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